MERRY CHRISTMAS Y’ALL!!
We have finally unpacked 90 percent of all the boxes in our new house. Whew!! Maybe now I can get back to business of writing, writing, and writing.
What’s on your Christmas Wish List this year? Mine is to send my draft of my second novel, Relative Consequences, to a professional editor by the end of this week. Then, I will take a deep breath, enjoy Christmas week. Oh, and let’s see, warm gloves, fragrant bubble bath, and whatever my sweet husband decides to give me.
After the first of the year, I plan to attack Weather Permitting (first novel) again with the hopes of success. Fingers crossed!
Today, I bring you Part 2 of my interview with Debra Ayers Brown. To review, Debra graciously gave me her time and honored me with her candid responses during our attendance this past June at the Southeastern Writers Conference in St. Simon’s Island, Georgia. To me, she is prime example of a strong Southern woman.
Debra Ayers Brown is a wife, mom, 10-year caregiver, and First Lady of Hinesville, Georgia. She graduated magna cum laude from the University of Georgia and earned her MBA from The Citadel. She and her daughter, Meredith, co-own My Write Platform where they provide T*N*T (training/networking/tips for writers who want to explode their business. They hold a ranking in the top 10 percent in social media influence by Klout. Check out Facebook.com/MyWritePlatform. The mother-daughter team is also committed to wellness with their driven to Wellness Facebook community and Two Pink Ladies Plexus Ambassadors at Facebook.com/pinkladiesssquared. Debra has published creative nonfiction in multiple issues of Chicken Soup for the Soul, Not Your Mothers Books, Guideposts, Chocolate for Women, and many other anthologies. She currently writes a humor column called “Life’s a Peach” in Liberty Life Magazine. She is also working on a nonfiction book on wellness and a cozy mystery series.
1. How many women do you know whom you consider to be strong?
I’d say a lot of women I know are strong, because like attracts like. I think we have a tendency to associate with people of whom we admire. I’m not saying we’re all alike. There are many ways to be strong. I have friends who have faced terrible medical situations with grace. I have others who have achieved phenomenal business success. I have crazy friends who show their bravery every time they steer me into an out-of-my-comfort-zone activity like zip lining.
2. What mantras do you use to get you through the rough times?
Actually, I think it is more inspiration than mantra. When my life as I’d known it imploded five years ago, I made a decision to keep moving forward. I wrote down my blessings daily, looked for the beauty in nature, and shared inspirational quotes on social media. It was important to me to focus on the positive. Even before I drew upon that “fail forward” attitude, I wrote articles for Guideposts and for Chicken Soup and similar publications, taking challenging situations and finding the good. I think, in everyday life, I try to do that. So if I had a mantra, it would be: Find your joy, be positive, and be happy. It sounds kind of silly, especially coming from my personality, but it really keeps me grounded.
3. I believe you’ve already answered this, but how proud are you to be Southern?
I really can’t imagine being anything else. I love the hospitality and the welcoming spirit of Southerners. I like the Southern ambiance with the ancient live oak trees, the Spanish moss, and wide porches with rocking chairs and swings. It’s a big part of it for me now because I live on the coast of Georgia. But, I was raised in the foothills of the North Georgia Mountains where I loved the change of seasons, first snowfalls, and small-town friendliness. So I’ve been blessed with the best of both. I like the quirky part, too. Everybody has that strange aunt or great-grandmother, like in our case. We not only have these characters in our lives, but we accept them and applaud them. I admire some of the things my spunky great grandmother, Susie Savannah Star, did that raised quite a few eyebrows. At about 90 pounds soaking wet, she definitely ruled the roost—including her daughter, who dared to marry someone not to Mama Starr’s liking. My great grandmother managed to get the marriage annulled, post haste, AND she used her fighting rooster to scare those in my generation. She was a colorful character until the day she died. Even with her faults, she was a strong Southern woman. She made it look fun to be Southern and to be a woman. How can you fault her?
4. As a woman in this day and time, how do you see the role of woman today?
I think a woman in this day and time has to juggle a lot of balls and keep them going since there are so many expectations of women today. I think even in my mother’s day, they had to do many of the same things we tackle now, but we’ve just added to the “to do” list. When my mother was in business, office procedures stayed pretty standard. Figuring out how to use the typewriter or whatever, was probably the most difficult challenge you had to master. Maybe I’m being simplistic, and Mom would disagree, but now we have to tackle new technology, software, social media sites, mobile apps, and the latest trends—all of which are constantly changing. And, on top of that, women must stay young, healthy and manage their money. So, when we retire, we’ll be able to maintain everything we’ve created. It’s a lot.
Actually, most women end up being alone because their husbands die before they do. So, one has to figure out how to be independent, handle the finances, and keep the family going. My mother had to face all of that, but it wasn’t so conscious, I think. She thought, “We’ve worked hard and saved our money; we’ve got our insurance. We can manage on what we’ve planned for retirement.” But, she didn’t have great expectations of travelling all over the world in her later years. My parents had worked hard for what they had, but they weren’t flamboyant. Until we took a cruise together, my mother never even thought of venturing out of the country. Mom and Dad had the road trip mentality—going from North Georgia to the beach. Now we think we need to figure out how to do a European vacation or a Mediterranean cruise.
Women have to be able to function in this society. And we have to plan for when we are no longer able to care for ourselves, now that we know it is easy to outlive our money. It’s a lot for a woman to handle—even a strong woman. But the upside, we have a wonderful network of strong women who we can turn to for support, encouragement, and for sound advice. We’re blessed.
Thank you, Debra, for allowing me to interview you. I enjoyed your insight and the glimpse into your southern background. You’ve reinforced my opinion that you are definitely a strong lady, straight from the South.
Please check Debra out on the following:
Have a wonderful and blessed Christmas, and a Happy New Year!
See y’all in 2017,